no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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