Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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