My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I love you.
Bad choice
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
