it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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