Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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