i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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