The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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