Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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