This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
