i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
third nipple confirmed
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
