I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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