A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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