trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
