yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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