At least make sure they are 18
Why
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
