Kiss
Puke
You can't motorboat a personality
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize