Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
