Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
