EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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