we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
