I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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