Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
