Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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