The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
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