My vagina just recognized that song.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize