What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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