I want to walk on stilts...naked
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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