Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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