my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Randomize
