she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
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