He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
