i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize