so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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