i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize
