Who wears a wallet chain?!
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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