You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize