come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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