Duck Duck Cougar?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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