he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
