"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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