Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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