Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize