cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Randomize
