mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
