Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
