I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize
