Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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