i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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