So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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