hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
The chlamydia really affected his face.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize