Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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